Lighter side of surgery Part 2
The lighter side of surgery, Part 2. Long before the Star Wars remakes and Lord of the Rings Trilogy, there was what has become a classic of another kind. Jim and I met 37 years ago and one of our first dates was to see The Princess Bride. We still love the movie and often find ourselves in situations where quotes from the movie are particularly useful. Tuesday was no exception. Waiting for my allotted time to be wheeled to the surgical suite I was visited by the physician doing the procedure. He introduced himself to me and then spotting Jim, he asked who he was. Without batting an eyelid I actually introduced him as my "House boy". I don't have a farm you see, so I couldn't very well call him "Farm boy". The doctor was speechless, Jim sputtered to recall his true identity and I tried to recover from what was obviously a slip of the tongue….or was it? Several hours later, after they were done electrocuting my heart, I had strict instructions to lay flat on my back, motionless in the bed for the next 3 hours. I'd already been in that position for the previous 4 hours and I was understandably a tad miffed, not to mention hungry, thirsty and in pain.
My nurse assured me that I could in fact eat and drink in that position without choking but that Jim would have to do it for me. Donning his super hero cape once more, House boy proceeded to feed me an assortment of approved food. I'd like to paint a picture of an Egyptian Princess reclining gracefully on a chaise with servants fanning palm frons while the breeze fluttered the curtains ushering in the lapping water from the Nile…..but I'm afraid it didn't look like that at all. A towel placed delicately over my chest and a plastic spoon hovering over my face scooping it's delicacies with limited precision. Most made it in, some didn't. At one point I thought I was going to snort applesauce…..it was a sight to behold…
In the past 2 days House boy has taken very good care of me. I have to have complete rest for a the next week or so which means lifting nothing, doing nothing and reclining as much as possible. House boy, fetch me that sandwich. House boy, fetch me that latte. House boy, fetch me whatever my heart desires…..House boy isn't responding today. He's back to work and I'm stuck here amusing myself by writing about my incredibly interesting adventures but as he descended into the basement, I'm pretty sure I heard him say, " As you wish"......